


You're Still You

by MothmansGirlfriend



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, I guess???, M/M, Recreational Drug Use, his hot dad bod, kind of a weird au, post suffering game, thb are back at the BOB after wonderland, the sacrifices stuck and mags still has his body, theres Feelings tm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 05:45:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10155248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MothmansGirlfriend/pseuds/MothmansGirlfriend
Summary: Taako can't sleep. Magnus can't sleep. They find a shared solution in Merle's stash.





	

“Merle, come on you old fuck, open up.”

Taako rapped his knuckles against the door once more. It was late, far too late to be bothering his roommates like this, even if it was _Merle_. The wood floors were like ice beneath his feet and Taako shivered as he pulled his snuggie (“borrowed” from Magnus) tighter around himself. 

He knew Merle would be pissed at him for waking him up at this hour, but Taako really didn’t have a choice. It was his fourth night in a row of being unable to sleep, and he really couldn’t bear the thought of spending yet another night sleepless and miserable.

Ever since the three of them returned from Wonderland, things had been a lot more tense around their suite. Each of them trying to recover from that...hellhole while also trying to pretend like everything was fine. Taako knew they should be lucky to be alive and (relatively) in one piece, but still. Shit was hard. 

Turning to put his back to the door frame, Taako caught a glimpse of himself in the hall mirror. _Fucking hell_ . He didn’t know if he’d ever get used to that: seeing a face in the mirror that’s so familiar but at the same time so foreign. The taste of copper rose at the back of his throat and he quickly turned back towards the door. _dont think about it dont think about it dont think about it_

Taako knocked again. Finally, blessedly, he heard shuffling from the room as the dwarf made his way to the door. “You better have a damn good reason for interrupting my beauty sleep.” Merle rubbed his good eye with his good hand, then blatantly scratched his butt. _Ew._

“Listen, I’ll pay you four whole gold pieces to give me an eighth and not ask any questions.” Taako punctuated his sentence with a tiny shake of his coin purse, the gold jingling quietly.

Merle simply narrowed his gaze. “Make it six gold.”

“Three.”

“You’re supposed to negotiate up, not down!”

“It’s two now.”

“Taako, d’ya honestly thi--”

“Going on one…”

“Okay, okay! Fine, you damn vulture,” Merle muttered as he took the remaining two coins and turned back into his room. Light from the table lamp suddenly flooded the room, and Taako took a moment to survey the room while he waited.

It wasn’t particularly cluttered, but it was messy nonetheless, with dirt ground into the carpet and a thick layer of dust coating everything. Merle’s wooden arm was sitting upright in a large flowerpot, jointed fingers twitching slightly. Large, flowering vines grew from the pot, spreading all over the room and glowing ever so faintly. A drawing of what appeared to be a family stood out to him from upon Merle’s desk, but Taako wasn’t quite close enough to make out what the subjects of the picture actually looked like.

“Here, now enjoy and kindly buzz off.” A small glass jar full of green buds was thrust into his hands right before the door was shut in his face. _Well then._

Putting his prize in the snuggie pocket, Taako headed towards his room, making sure to tiptoe past Magnus’ door. Judging by the sounds of tossing and turning coming from him, it seemed like Magnus was having the same sleeping issues as Taako. An wave of sympathy thrummed through his chest.

He couldn’t begin to imagine what aging ten whole years in seconds felt like. Sure, Magnus had said he was fine with it. But Taako noticed him, when Magnus thought he was alone, studying the new lines on his face and gray in his hair. The same way Taako would study his now dulled hair and dried out skin. The same way Merle would stare at his eyepatch before slowly putting it in place. The taste of metal filled his mouth yet again, and Taako quickly moved on to his room to find his pipe.

It took several minutes of digging and cussing but he finally pulled it out from under a pile of clothes in the chair where his dirty laundry went. It was rather elegant, long and curved, in a swirling light purple color. Digging for the weed in his pocket, Taako started breaking up one of the nugs and putting them in the pipe’s bowl.

With a deep sigh, Taako flung himself back onto his bed, sparked a flame with one of his fingers, and took a hit.

The smoke curled around him as he exhaled slowly, trying not to cough. Smoky wisps spread through the room, illuminated by the moonlight, from the real moon. Taako took another hit, and closed his eyes, already feeling his mind go blurry. This was nice. For a few moments, things felt like they hadn’t changed at all. He could pretend, even if it was just for now, that things we’re going to be okay. That tomorrow he’d wake up, looking how he’s _supposed_ to look, and Magnus and Merle will be eating breakfast with perfectly functioning eyes and at the right age.

A knock at the door snapped him out of this fantasy.

 _Ah, shit._ Merle must have fully realized that Taako ripped him the hell off. Taako took a toke and headed towards his door, already forming an argument in his head. “Listen Merle, it’s not my fault you’re a bad negoti--”

But instead of opening his door to a dwarf, he opened it to a human. Magnus.

“Oh. Hey, Mags. Sorry, thought you were Merle, coming to fight me over two GP and some weed.”

Magnus briefly looked confused before laughing. “Yeah, I uh, figured that’s why you were knocking on Merle’s door at three in the morning. Take it you can’t sleep either, huh?”

Taako sighed. “Yeah, sleep and I haven’t exactly been on good terms recently. Hence the,” he raised his pipe to serve as the end to his statement. Magnus nodded quickly at the pipe.

“That’s kind of why I’m here?” Rubbing the back of his head with one hand, Magnus looked down to the floor before continuing. “I was wondering if maybe you’d...share? It’s just. I could really use some sleep.”

That was...not what Taako was expecting. Then again, he wasn’t sure what he was expecting in the first place. Pretending to be scandalized, Taako threw a hand over his chest and swooned backwards. “Do mine ears deceive me? Is this brave, lawful good hero truly going to partake in such degeneracy? Well, I do declare!”

Magnus broke into a full smile, highlighting his wrinkles in full. Taako swallowed. _just ignore it ignore it_

Taako stepped away from the door, beckoning Magnus inside as he sat on the bed. Magnus hesitated briefly before sitting on the bed as well, something that didn’t slip past Taako.

“You know how to use this thing right?” Taako asked as he handed Magnus the pipe. He nodded in return as he nestled the pipe in his grasp. It was almost comically small in Magnus’ large hand, and Taako had to hold back a giggle.

“Wait, how do I light it?”

_oh._

“Oh! Uh, like this.” Scooching up to sit next to Magnus, Taako sparked up his left hand and held it near him. He fully expected Magnus to simply move the bowl near his hand, but instead, instead--

Magnus grabs it. And holds it. Gently, as he moves it towards the pipe.

_Oh. That’s. Huh._

Taako swallows and hopes it's too dark for Magnus to see how hard he’s blushing. Magnus’ hand was just so warm, and rough but so gentle…

And now Magnus is jiggling his hand.

“Taako?” Taako shakes his head, snapping out of the trance induced by Magnus’ hand and the weed. Magnus is nudging the pipe into his arm; it must be Taako’s turn. He takes the piece from him and hits it, inhaling long and deep.

It was silent for a while, the two of them smoking in silence, bathed in the moonlight.

The atmosphere was tense, full of unspoken words and thoughts. The end of the bowl was finally reached, yet neither of them seemed any closer to sleep.

“Another bowl?”

“Yup.”

Magnus passed the glass jar to Taako from his nightstand, and Taako started pulling apart another nug. It's when he’s packing it into the bowl that Magnus says it:

“You’re still _you_ , you know that, right?”

Taako froze. His brain flew into a panic mode, and he spun to face Magnus, nearly dropping the pipe in doing so. Magnus was looking at him with a terrifying amount of sincerity, and Taako struggled to quickly find his words. 

“...What. Uh. What--how do you mean, exactly.”

Magnus quirked his lips. “Like. Just the way you are. Like yeah, a few things are different, but like. _You’re_ still _you_. You still talk the same, and act the same, and laugh the same, and dress the same...compared to all that, a few details of your face are just...kinda insignificant. You’ll always be who you are on the inside, and...I think that person’s pretty great.”

Taako felt his mouth go dry, and the weed wasn’t entirely to blame. “Oh, wow, those are emotions,” Taako found himself saying involuntarily, and Magnus laughed nervously in response.

“I...thank you.” He said weakly, after a moment’s pause. Taako sank back into his pillows a bit more, and Magnus laid on his back next to him.

The pipe passed a few more times before Taako found his voice.

“I...I think your person’s pretty great too, Mags. I mean, your person’s always been great. Like, fuck, remember the ogre fight at the Bureau like a week after we met? You jumped twenty feet out of a window just to save my ass.” Magnus smiled at the memory, his eyes growing soft.

“Seriously, Mags....you’re the first guy who’s ever really had my back, like...ever.” Taako stared up at the ceiling, feeling Magnus’ gaze burning his cheek. He reluctantly turned to pass him the pipe, and Taako tried to decipher the expression on Magnus’ face. Somewhere between awe and sympathy.

Taako quickly turned back towards the window, away from Magnus. _Way to go, Taako, getting all touchy-feely and shit. Like Mags wants to hear about your emotional baggage._ He hears Magnus inhale, long and deep, followed by a slow exhale.

“Well, it's certainly a back worth having." 

_Oh shit._

Taako flipped over once more. Magnus was watching him with a softened expression, tendrils of smoke drifting from his lips. Wanting desperately to fill the silence with _something_ , Taako opened his mouth to reply...but no words came to him. How was he supposed to respond to _that_?

“Yeah, well, you know. I was a back model in my younger days.” Taako finally strung together, mentally slapping himself as soon as the words left his mouth. _Good going, dipshit. That’s like, in the top ten dumbest things you’ve ever said._

Luckily, Magnus just laughed. Taako took the piece from him, and watched Magnus out the corner of his eye as he lit the bowl. As Taako inhaled, Magnus swallowed hard and licked his lips. Then Taako lowered the bowl, prepared to exhale--and it happened.

Magnus sprang forward and kissed Taako.

He kissed Taako deeply, bringing his hands up to gently grasp Taako’s jaw, rubbing his thumbs slowly over his cheeks. After the initial shock of _oh, wow, Mags on my face,_ Taako felt himself melting into Magnus’ touch. The pipe slipped from Taako’s hands, and he hesitantly placed his hands on Magnus’ broad shoulders.

A small eternity passed before the two of them pulled apart, electricity dancing off their skin.

“Hey, Taako?”

“Yeah?”

“...Could...could I kiss you?”

Taako snorted out a laugh. “You kinda already did there, bubala.” A sheepish look spread across Magnus’ face, before he started laughing with Taako.

“I know, I just--I felt bad that I didn’t ask before so...I figured better late than never?” Taako rolled his eyes. “Oh, what a perfect gentleman you are, Mags.” Sitting upright, Taako rooted around in the bedsheets until he recovered the pipe. Thankfully Taako had packed it tight enough that none of its contents fell out.

Taako placed the mouth of the pipe at Magnus’ lips, snapped two fingers together to produce a small flame, and lit the bowl. As he inhaled, Taako admired how his silver hair glinted in the flickering light. As terrible as it was that Magnus lost so much of his lifespan, Taako couldn’t deny that this new look was working for him. _Now if only I could say the same of my own new look…_

A sudden tapping on his shoulder brought Taako out of his head. Magnus was tapping him with one hand and motioning towards his mouth with other. “ _sht gn.”_ Magnus said through unmoving lips, trying not to lose any smoke.

_Well, don’t mind if I do._

Taako brought his face close to Magnus’, looking deep into his brown eyes as he held his mouth open, and Magnus started to exhale into him. Their lips were less “brushing” and more “just full on pressed together”, and Taako was pretty sure he felt Magnus’ tongue poking out to meet his near the end.

There were only a few hits left in the piece by this point. The two of them took turns shotgunning the other a few more times, until the bowl ran out and they started yawning, exhaustion blessedly starting to win out over insomnia.

Taako put the pipe on his nightstand, and started pulling the covers of his bed over himself. Magnus cleared his throat. “So...guess I’ll be heading back to my room now?” Taako could hear the reluctance in his voice and quickly shook his head.

“No! Uh, no, you--you can stay here, if you want. I mean. Yeah.” Relief flooded Magnus’ face, and he pulled the blanket over himself as well.

They laid in silence for a few moments, facing each other from their sides of the bed, before Magnus rolled his eyes and pulled Taako close. He nestled himself into Magnus’ chest, spreading his palm flat over his heartbeat, feeling its slow and steady beat. A large hand started rubbing Taako’s shoulder as a kiss was pressed onto the top of his head.

Just as Taako’s about to drift off, Magnus’ voice punctures the silence.

“Hey, Taak?”

“Yeah, Mags?”

“...We’re always gonna have each other, right?”

“Yeah, big guy. ‘Til the very end.”


End file.
